Sunday, 30 August 2009


In my experiences in the city (read Bangalore) I have seen many small cars with dents and other signs of damage like big gashes on the side, missing head/tail lights, cracked windshields and the like. But the thing is most of these cars are Altos.

Why the Alto you ask? I will tell you with a nice comparison with other cars.

1) Why the Alto and not the Zen - this is because the Zen is old and not in production anymore. What satisfaction would anyone get, especially a sadistic bus driver (nasty mofos), from making an old car look older ? I'll tell you...NONE. You tell me. When you're pissed off out of your mind, screaming for vengeance, do you go trash your grandfather's clock. No ? Good.

2) Why the Alto and not the Swift - the Swift is newer, more expensive. Besides that it's a nice fast car and regardless of the driver, it will avoid the damn buses. Unless it's parked. But that's no worry since buses don't 'regularly' crash into parked cars. They just do it once in a while. Either way, chances are that there's an Alto close by, sheepishly inviting trouble.

3) Why the Alto and not the 800 - if the Zen is old, the 800 is ancient...go figure.

4) Why the Alto and not the i20 - the i20 is so beautiful, no sane person or crack one for that matter, would want to damage something so beautiful. Besides the Alto looks quite similar to the i20 so it's almost like you're hitting an i20 wihout actually damaging that beautiful piece of machinery. Two birds with one stone or rather a KSRTC vehicle.

5) Why the Alto and not the i10 - the i10 is smaller and more difficult to hit and since the Alto is a bit longer, it presents as a more visually appealing target.

6) Why the Alto and not a mid size car - more expensive than the others and if it's a mid size car, someone with too much testosterone and nothing to do with it is driving, or a woman with a husband with same qualities as described previously is driving it and you don't really want to take chances cause those things are so low, they might just go right under the bus or help in flipping it over.


7) Why the Alto and not the WagonR, the Spark,the Estillo or the Fusion - hitting any of these cars or even contact with any of them is an insult to even the oldest and most beaten up bus, ksrtc, bmtc or otherwise.

And of course,

8) Why the Alto and not the Reva - bachche ko maaroge kya ? Going at a minimum speed of 20kmph you risk sending the car on a flight. No seriously. Don't do it.

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